How Bruce Wayne Should Make Some Extra Cash

I was speaking with a pal recently about Batman. It happens.

He pointed out something about how the tread on the Batmobile, in Joel Shumacher’s version of things, would lead people back to the Batcave. See, the tires apparently have Bat Symbols as treads instead of typical treads.

This is, of course insane from a standard safety aspect, but we’re also talking about a car that has a literal afterburner in it. So, we’ll ignore that part of it for now.

He contended that, in the snow, these little Bat Symbols would leave a little Bat Trail back to the Bat Cave. I don’t necessarily agree with that for several reasons I’ll detail at another time.

Batman action figures | kessel korner
I mean, the treads are the least noticeable thing about this car, if I’m honest.

My thoughts are really rooted in one of the campier aspects of the Batman mythos. Except for Nolan’s films, Batman has always been seemingly obsessed with leaving his mark on things. Boots, computers, cars, utility belts…he’s a branding fiend.

Zack Snyder made him a literal branding fiend, as Batman actually branded his symbol on criminals. This somehow led to other criminals targeting them in prison, though one would think Batman has sent enough of them there that it would be more like something that would be instant admission to a gang. It could maybe be the ticket to a support group. It could be a clue to police to make sure those prisoners didn’t live in General Population. But whatever, that’s a subject for another time, too.

What I’m thinking is that, Bruce Wayne should set up a shadow business on the side to market Batman-related merchandise in Gotham. Think about it. Create a company that creates merchandise to cater to the market.

Batman action figures | kessel korner
Proceeds benefit the Wayne Enterprises Children Fund.

An Important Market

Batman is the hero of Gotham, rising above the corrupt governmental entities to show the people there is a better way. There’s no way people wouldn’t be wearing his gear, or even suiting up their singer at a gig with a Batman shirt. There were undoubtedly bands that would want to have Batman-branded instruments, too.

And it would be perfectly hiding things in plain sight! That way, if anyone saw Bruce Wayne with something that had a Batman symbol on it, he could play it off just that it’s sample merchandise that he owned.

He could even market items about his criminal enemies. What are they going to do? Sue? Good luck.

The best part is that he could use the merchandise as a way to reinforce public support. It’s like a charm offensive in plain sight, and he could make extra money with it to fund his crime fighting equipment needs.

He could also nobly use the money to donate to charitable causes like orphanages and to helping at-risk kids. That way, he’s doing the heavy lifting of kicking the Joker’s butt on the regular while making sure that Billy goes to school.

Then there would also be fewer think-pieces from dopes about all the problems they have with Batman.

It solves every problem.

P.S. I’m aware Ozymandius went down this road in Watchmen, so there’s no need to fall all over yourselves pointing this out. I’m just casting it in a way that would actually work for Bruce Wayne to make some cash while also continuing to be a crime fighter of principle.