Batman & Robin is a fairly-reviled Batman movie. Joel Schumacher was regarded as history’s greatest monster for some time after its creation (greater even than Nixon or Carter).

To be honest, he bore the brunt of that criticism fairly well over the years.  I can also say that, as a Batman fan, once I grew up a little and understood he was intending to make a Batman movie that looked and felt like the Batman TV show he knew from his youth, I softened quite a bit. I still don’t like Batman & Robin, but I admire the chutzpah Schumacher had to go for broke.

The fans eventually wore him down, though. They do that. He started claiming he wanted to make something closer to The Dark Knight, but the studio wanted something in the vein of what we all got.

We’ll let history sort that out. Of concern today is the fact that science may ruin the fun.

Mr. Freeze covets a diamond.
What Keelt the Dynosores? Dee Ice Aech!

One of my favorite things to mock about Batman & Robin is that Mr. Freeze powers his suit using diamonds. He steals them, drops them in his cold suit, and it powers him up. One would think you wouldn’t hinge your very survival on the continued consumption of a thing which is severely hard to acquire, but it’s not like normal people aren’t guilty of this, too.

What makes me laugh, though, is it’s a plot device listed straight out of the 1960s Batman TV show. In a movie full of such things, it’s a standout.

Then today, I happened across an article that may turn my favorite jokey plot point into something that makes Batman & Robin into a futuristic work of note.

Scientists are turning nuclear waste into diamond batteries.

Yes, I know the article is from November. I just saw it recently. I’m not a news bureau.

The point is that this will rob me of something I love to mock about a movie I love to mock, and so the world will seem just a little bit sadder.

Stupid science.

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