Sure, I had a satirical moment with the #BanBigGuy thing, but let’s get back to some Star Wars. Today’s blast of cold air isn’t from lousy Smarch weather, but from where my brain went with The Empire Strikes Back.
This blog is also a challenge to you.
I thought a bit about poor Admiral Ozzel (more on him in another forthcoming post) and the survival skills of Admiral Piett, then considered another Imperial officer who seems to escape any reprimand, either from Vader or the fans.
General Veers does his Dark Lord’s bidding and leads an attack on the rebel base on Hoth. Everyone trumpets this as a victory, because the rebel base is destroyed and it makes everyone angst-y from my generation jump on the Kevin Smith Bandwagon and say that Empire shows the harshness of life.
However, the attack on the rebels is very unsuccessful and I’ll tell you why.
Zoom Zoom Zoom
The rebels got away. Not just Vader’s prize, Luke Skywalker, mind you. Han Solo & Company get away too. Heck, the very first transport gets away. While that showed further boobery on the part of the Imperial Navy, it also shows how poorly Veers planned for this attack.
He goes full-tilt for the rebel base itself, and not for the obviously-parked-outside escape ships sitting outside the protective hangar bays. Even if you say that the transports themselves waited inside the base (they didn’t, you can clearly see one lifting off as Luke gets in his X-Wing), Veers didn’t set up an anti-aircraft battery or two to stop things from getting away.
(Even the blindingly inept Trade Federation set up guns outside the hangars on Naboo in Episode I. Not particularly effective ones, but they tagged at least one ship.)
Why couldn’t this general adopt a siege mentality, and park everything just out of range of the rebels’ guns and just wait them out? They’re on a flipping snow planet and obviously need supplies flown in to them. Starve the rebels into making a move that brings mistakes and panic, or even defections from those too stupid to realize you’re just going to kill them all for being traitors.
Or at the very least, look for where the ships are parked and attack that instead of the base itself, where the defenses are concentrated!
Seriously, George Patton would slap the silly out of Veers in a heartbeat.
But I Have The Answer!
See, I’ve actually got the answer to this one in my brain. But I want to give all you Empire–lovers the chance to guess what that answer is.
It’s so elegantly simple and obvious that I’m surprised I’ve not thought of it before.
But give it a crack below. I’ll reveal my answer tomorrow, but will gladly entertain discussions until then. I think, honestly, that this explanation is so beautifully perfect that it’s the only one that truly works.
Are you up to the challenge?