Look, the blog is named after a Star Wars reference. You’re just going to have to accept that there’s no real escaping that I’m going to write about. I just hope you enjoy the uniquely honest perspective. I’m always going to give it to you straight.
So let me deal plainly on this matter. I have resigned as Star Wars Ombudsman. It is with a heavy heart and tired soul that I decide to put that hat on the rack and choose not to put it on again. But I have some parting words of wisdom for those that love to question, needle and nitpick these movies to the point where they leech every last ounce of fun out of it. You don’t like it, then cool. Just be civil about it and talk sense, and when it’s time to let the conversation drop, let it drop.
First and foremost, the best and nicest thing you can do with a fan is to let them be a fan. If someone declares their fandom, or even if they go on a tangent about what they love, let them be. We’ve all got our own thing. It’s not a contest to see whose favorite thing is better. Since it’s all based on subjectivity anyway, don’t feel obligated to try to poop all over something someone else likes just for the sake of it. If you do, you’re just a jackass.
Fair criticism is one thing, and it’s fun sometimes to engage in a debate about something. It’s even more fun when someone’s hater status is based almost entirely on the fact that they missed lines of dialogue or didn’t get the point of something.
This is a difficult thing I’m struggling with right now as I continue my endeavors to understand this whole Twilight thing (reading them so that my criticisms can be legitimate instead of knee-jerk). Sometimes you just have to accept that people like what they like and there ain’t a thing you gonna do about it.
To put it in more palatable terms, some people are Van Halen with Roth, some are Van Halen with Hagar. You’re probably not going to get anyone to change camps by talking about how much disdain you have for the other.
Second, let it go. In specific, about the prequels. Those of us that love them, we’re not the ones with a problem. We love them, we have fun with them, we consider them a great source of happiness. Those with the habit of apoplectically ranting about the fact that they dislike them and why, they’re the ones with a problem. The first prequel came out more than 10 years ago. Do you frequently feel the need to harp on something you disliked from that long ago?
I know that I’ve disliked a lot of things through life, but somehow I’ve learned to let them go. I mean, that would be a great trend if all we did was sit around and talk about was things we disliked in the past.
Third, be consistent with your hater-ism. You remember the Matrix sequels? I do. To me, they were pieces of completely pretentious garbage. Hey congratulations, Keanu Reeves is a bad actor in slow-motion too. Do you know what I say when someone says they really liked them?
- I’ll let you know, because I have yet to have it happen; or
- See my first point
The over-arching point is that I don’t feel obliged to tear them apart unless someone asks me what I specifically disliked about them. Also, it has nothing to do with the fact that I really liked the original. It hasn’t held up under the test of time as much as I thought it would, but it was a fun ride.
Fourth, if you ever claimed to be a die-hard fan, stop talking the talk if you can’t walk the walk. Please. Easily the most frustrating thing about Star Wars fans is that they have Lucas’ influences roll off their tongue like holy scripture — Kurosawa, Flash Gordon, silent films, pulp serials, et al. — but by and large they’re not literate in them. These aren’t just influences on the films, Star Wars is their direct descendant. They’re the definition of post-modern art: the best of the past combined in a new and fresh way that is original and exciting for the audience.
Fifth, who am I kidding? I’ll never back down from a rousing Star Wars debate/argument. In fact, one of the things that gives me greatest pleasure in life is making other geeks lose their minds when I take their own arguments apart and stymie them at every turn. See, I’ve been doing this too long. Too many people have regarded me as Lucas’ official spokesman over the years for me not to have heard every single argument you could offer. I learned from all of the arguments and just kept the responses stored in my brain.
Which is likely why I have trouble remembering where I put my cell phone every morning. This is what you’ve all done to me. It’s your fault. So let me put my hat back on and shame you with your lack of understanding.
But it’s OK because I love and forgive you anyway. See you next time. And if you have the urge, please send a note to Mr. Lucas that he owes me for 33 years back pay.