Bruce Springsteen Can Go Screw Himself

Bruce Springsteen

Me an’ Wendy, we’re from Jurzee, an’ we’re gonna charge these streets for standin’ room at the show, a-whoa-whoa-whoa

Recently, a coworker—who is a huge Bruce Springsteen fan—urged me to scratch the item off my bucket list and get tickets to see him perform live. I’ve already missed the chance to see Clarence play, so why not see the remaining members of the band before they too turn to dust?

So out of morbid curiosity, I decided to go look up tickets. The cheapest ticket I could find, in the sh*tty seat section, is $119 before fees ($149 after).

Allow me to say I know I’m not unique in complaining about ticket prices for concerts. When I saw my first show, it was 1991 at the Capital Centre (Maryland), it was Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers and it cost something like twenty-five US dollars. And they were good seats. You can expect prices to rise with inflation, but this is ridiculous.
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My Low Estimation of Kevin Smith’s Talents (and Flashback Blog: Enough Already)

Kevin Smith

Oh, right. He also thinks that making funny faces for press pictures is still funny. Yeah. OK.

Recently when speaking with The Clone, we both happened to mention our distaste for Clerks 2. Since I’m migrating all of my old blogs from blogs.starwars.com/kesseljunkie, I dug this one up to show that Mr. Smith has been standing on my last nerve for quite some time.

Then, as I read through it, I realized that it doesn’t even encompass my distaste for his continued employment. It’s at the point where it actually kind of bothers me that this schmuck is making good money on supposedly busting the myths around comic book geeks…by perpetuating them.

Read More and Get a Double-Dose of Bringing the Pain »

How Deep Is Your Love? (Part the First)

Stormtroopers on Tatooine

They were looking for rational Star Wars fans. Their bleached armor and bones are all that remain.

There’s a topic that’s been on my mind for some time, especially after the re-release of The Phantom Menace in theatres.

Inevitably, in the aftermath of its return to the national consciousness I got to enjoy the amplification of the never–ending argument that anyone who dares have a contrary opinion to the “conventional wisdom” about the prequels (as I have demonstrated, time and again, that I do) lives any time they utter said opinion.

Once, just once, I’d like to have something Star Wars–related come out and Haters just leave me to enjoy it in peace.

Just. Once.*

(special exemption for full and honorary members of the Convocation)

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Fandom, Fanaticism and the Question of Art

In a recent Q&A session with Nicholas Meyer, director of Star Trek II and Star Trek VI, he said, “Art is not a democracy.”

I find that to be a particularly interesting statement from a film director, considering the tremendous amount of collaborative work from set designers, production managers and assistant directors (as well as visual effects teams in a lot of cases). But it’s a great point when viewed through the lens of fandom, and it ties into a something that came up during the long–running comments between myself and Tony over the last month about Star Wars v. Star Trek.

The nature of nerd fandom is a uniquely strange thing, one that I have yet to see repeated in other fan bases. There is a level of obsession that exists that is admittedly extremely unhealthy. Trust me, I took a long, long road from the Star Wars fan I was to the Star Wars fan I am.

Star Wars poster

This poster, signed by the guy who played Dack (John Morton), was tacked up in my room.

To sidetrack onto that journey and give a little background, I was at one time the typical über-fan whom people usually mock. At least half my wardrobe was comprised of Star Wars T-Shirts. My walls were covered with posters of female singers whom I adored/lusted (Geri Halliwell, Sheryl Crow, Tori Amos) and…Star Wars pictures and posters. (Occasionally I’d mix things up with a poster from Reservoir Dogs or something like that.) I owned many, many toys and kept them on display for everyone to see. So long as they were in my room at my parents’ house.

Yes, Star Wars was my golden calf. May the angels of heaven protect you if you touched my stuff or came in with a criticism you couldn’t defend. I would spend hours trying to convert people, to convince them that it was not only perfectly normal to obsess about a fake universe of laser swords and Dark Lords, but they were somehow deficient because they didn’t.

Honestly, why my brother didn’t do me the favor of a serious ass-kicking, I’ll never know. It’s probably a testament to what a loving brother he truly is.

Anyway, like most geeks (a sub-genus of nerd) I felt that I had something of a “claim” to the Star Wars storyline. Like a jealous lover, anything that threatened disharmony within the galaxy far, far away was a matter of extreme angst.

However, this is not unique to Star Wars nerds/geeks/et al. Spend some time with a Lord of the Rings, Dungeons & Dragons, Star Trek or (if any exist still) Babylon 5 fan, and you’ll see. With some, it’s as plain as the chain mail under their shirt; others have learned to control themselves like a Zen Bruce Banner, but find the right combination of triggers and they Hulk Out on you just the same.

Star Wars Dork

This is a close approximation of what I was, with more hair and less weight. I have less weight now, but still no hair.

They’ve taken the notion of fandom and turned it into fanaticism. With this fanaticism comes a heavy price for artists.

Harlan Ellison wrote an essay called Xenogenesis about the phenomenon and delivered it in a speech in July 1984. Many science fiction writers shared stories with him that resonate today, and seem to be repeating with other sci-fi/fantasy creators through the new millenium.

Reading it (in a collected work in the early 1990s) started the change in my own perspective. It was a glacial change, but it took less than a decade to complete the journey, which was less than half the time I’d taken becoming an OCD fan, so that counts as a win.

In the essay, Ellison postulated what I came to realize, which was that sci-fi and fantasy fans take it to a whole level that causes a sort of metamorphosis in them. They feel that they have just as much ownership over the artist’s work as the artist him/herself.

If you know anything about Mr. Ellison, you know what he had to say about that. He did, however, sound the warning bell for the rest of us.

The tricky thing of course is how much fandom is too much fandom? Is a convention too much fandom? Putting a phaser app on my Droid phone? Recreating the entire set of the Enterprise from the original Star Trek TV show and creating a completely unwatchable fan series?

I would submit that none of those things is too much fandom, unless….

It fosters the notion that the fans somehow “own” the material as much as the artist, or that they have some sort of legitimate input to bring to the table for the creative process.

Something like Star Trek is a uniquely difficult one in this realm, though, because by its very nature it’s “art by committee,” which isn’t really art but entertainment. There isn’t some singular visionary force behind the series as a whole. However, allow me to use the disclaimer that TV entertainment can be art when you’re talking about something where a singular theme/plot/vision is in place from the beginning (I’d call this “The LOST Principle”).

In general, however, while there may be instances of singular visionary forces (i.e., the aforementioned Mr. Meyer) that produce singular cases of art within the context of the whole, Star Trek has always been the child of 1000 fathers and mothers. It remained “television” in its very nature, even after it crossed to film.

But again, if the fans had their way, Spock never would have died (there were protests when that d*ck Roddenberry leaked that plot point), robbing us of one of the most poignant and moving science fiction stories of the last 30 years. If the fans had their way, Darth Vader never would have found redemption, but rather would have turned Luke to the Dark Side and lived nastily ever after because that hard edge they earned when Suzie McAllister* turned them down for homecoming showed them how life is always rough and never ends happily.

*I made up this name. If there is a real Ms. McAllister out there, why did you turn him down, you cold monster?

Smeagol

Changed it! Changed it from the bookses they did!

(Of course, I will give credit where it’s due and say that Lord of the Rings fans managed to stop some really egregious bulls*** from going into those movies that would have completely ruined them. But that’s more of a case of the fans having spent more time with the material than the fan/guy making the movies based on the source material books. If he were the one creating the films from whole cloth, different story.)

Back to the main point, though, fans have to give up this idea that because they’re fans they have some sort of right of input. At that point it stops being art and becomes merely entertainment. Beyond that, it becomes entertainment that caters only to a specific audience.

That’s fine, though. There’s nothing wrong with entertainment either. Not everything needs to be a classic. But know how to discriminate between the two.

And if something doesn’t strike your fancy, then fine. You’re not obligated to stick with anything. Just ask Bruce Springsteen or a host of other musicians who try new things how well that’s been received by their “hard core” audiences. It doesn’t invalidate the work, nor does it invalidate the fans. If you’re only a fan of Bruce Springsteen up until Tunnel of Love (like me), that’s cool. If you liked the first Matrix but disliked the sequel(s), then that’s cool. If you prefer David Lee Roth to Sammy Hagar…well, all right then. I’ve talked about that sort of thing as well.

I guess my reaction is, if you dislike it then move along. There’s no need to stay invested in something if you dislike it. It’s like people who watch TV shows into their later seasons and bemoan how much better it was earlier. You know what I did when The Simpsons started to stink on ice? I walked away. Thanks for the memories, the stuff I liked was great and I’m sure there are people that think the later stuff is golden. That’s fine too. But I’m not going to keep watching the show and tell everyone every week how much I liked the older seasons more.

Why would I keep watching if I disliked it?

And that’s the crux of the problem with sci-fi/fantasy fans. They carry that vested interest with them, so even as they start to dislike something so much that they spew venom at it, they just stay in the relationship for no other reason than habit. And even worse, if someone else seems happy with what they now dislike then they attack that happiness too, with all the force they can muster. It’s not a matter of civil disagreement, it’s a matter of religious zeal.

Naturally, I fall into the trap from time to time of one of those pointless arguments. If you keep hanging with snarling nerds, it’s like being an alcoholic hanging out with friends who still drink. The chances of a relapse are very, very high.

But I’m pretty happy with the fact that I’ve changed my outlook from dork apostle to quiet believer. If someone wants to have the discussion, then cool. But it’s difficult to be too deeply involved in the nerd world anymore, especially when it comes to disagreements about artwork (which is what good films should strive to be). We need to remember that we’re just spectators, not participants, and not owners of the work by any stretch.

Goodness I went off on a tangent, didn’t I?